How Reaching Out to a Friend Each Week Improves Well-Being

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Time Magazine reporter Angela Haupt explains in a recent article that reaching out to a new friend every week can improve well-being. She points out that modern communication tools, like text messages, often lack the intention and thoughtfulness needed to deepen friendships.

Miriam Kirmayer, a clinical psychologist in Montreal who researches adult friendships, told TIME: “We’re constantly receiving and exchanging information and communicating in some way, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the quality of the connection is there—or that the intention is. When you ask someone if they’ve purposefully, intentionally, and thoughtfully reached out to a friend via text, they often say, ‘Hold on, no, I haven’t. I’ve texted someone about arranging a playdate for my kid, or I’ve texted my spouse about what we’re cooking for dinner tonight.’ But people don’t necessarily take the time to check in with friends in that way, with intention.”

Haupt highlights a few simple ways to support well-being.

  • Why we should do it? Small interactions like greetings and smiles can improve connection and ease loneliness. These short moments can lift mood and build skills like communication and openness. Kirmayer told TIME, “It doesn’t take much, when we’re craving connection, to feel a bit closer and meet that need.”
  • What to say? Kirmayer suggests not overthinking messages. Perfectionism can stop you from reaching out, and the exact wording matters less than taking action. Keep it personal and specific by sharing why the person came to mind or recalling a shared moment. Be clear about your purpose, whether you want to meet or talk, so your message feels natural and genuine.
  • Put a spin on it: Make it a habit to reach out, such as messaging one friend each week, and switch between people to expand your connections and social skills. If you choose to message the same person often, it may feel harder since it calls for deeper conversation, so decide if you want variety or a stronger bond.

Kirmayer also notes that messaging the same person regularly can feel intimidating, as it pushes you to think about how to deepen the connection. She advises checking in with yourself about your needs, your intentions, and the area of your social life you want to grow.

Acknowledgement: This summary was generated using AI writing tools as part of my AI Explorations process. For more information, please refer to the original articles listed below.

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